The War at Home
by SassyCop
Summary: When something like this happened, there was a potential for people to panic.
1. Chapter 1

**My first attempt at a multi chapter story for Army Wives. It will be centered on Jackie, since she is my favorite character. Kelli Williams is made of awesome! This is a short chapter to get us going, and to make sure this fandom wants me here…**

Jackie was in the produce aisle at the PX when she heard the rapid gunfire and sudden screams. She couldn't tell exactly where the shots came from, but she knew that was what she heard. She had been trained early on in life to handle firearms. Her father had been a General in the Army and he had made sure she was very familiar with the weapons in their house. He had insisted on it for safety reasons.

Several people were yelling and running. She saw a young mother with two children standing, frozen in fear, beside her shopping cart. She had a son that looked to be three or four years old and a daughter that was about 18 months. Jackie immediately thought of herself shopping in the PX with Patrick and Sophie when they were that age.

She knew she needed to get them out of there and the only way to go was the back loading dock entrance which was on the other side of the produce section from where they were at. She quickly ran to the woman, grabbed her arms and shook her to get her attention. The woman made eye contact with her.

"Get your son and follow me." Jackie picked up the young girl from the seat in the cart, grabbed the diaper bag and ran toward the back door. The woman picked up her son and followed Jackie. Right as they entered the back storage area, Jackie heard the shots getting closer. She saw several people leave through the loading dock doors. She went to lead the woman across the open storage area when the doors they had come through from the produce section were thrown open.

Jackie saw the gunman and dragged the woman and her children behind a shelf. She noticed a small broom closet and shoved the three of them inside. She dropped the diaper bag and handed the woman her daughter. The closet was too small for all of them to fit.

"Stay in here. Don't come out. No matter what happens. Ok?" Jackie tried to close the door but the woman blocked her.

"What about you?" She asked in a panicked voice.

"I'll be fine! Just stay here!" Jackie closed the door quietly and pushed a large mop bucket that was on wheels in front of it. She then crouched down behind the shelf.

She could see the shooter through the shelves. He was walking toward the back door. When he got there, he closed the doors tightly and locked them. He then stacked crates and boxes in front of them. He turned to walk back toward the store. Jackie hoped she would be able to stay hidden until he was gone and then get the woman and her kids out. Right as the shooter reached the doors that led back in to the store, the young girl she had hidden squealed loudly. The shooter immediately turned around and looked in their direction. He paused for a few seconds and then when he heard nothing he went to leave again.

Right then Jackie's cell phone she had tucked into her jacket pocket started ringing. She grabbed at it frantically, trying to mute the sound. But it was too late. When she looked up from her phone, the shooter had his automatic rifle pointed directly at her. "Well, look what we have here."

**TBC**

**The first 3 chapters are done. Wanted to get a feel for whether or not people would like this before I wrote any more…**


	2. Chapter 2

**Thanks for the feedback! **

Fort Marshall was on lock down. It had been an easy decision for Michael. A soldier had returned from Afghanistan to find his wife had left him and taken their children with her. He had reportedly spent his first few days back drinking himself into oblivion. Once the alcohol wore off, he had gone to a few houses on base trying to get information from his wife's friends as to where she may have gone. He was angry and carrying his Army issued rifle. Several calls were made to the MP's and they were looking for him everywhere. It was safer for everyone if all movement was halted and the gates barred. It would make finding the gunman easier.

After the order was given and the wheels set in motion, Michael thought to call Jackie Clarke and notify her that the base was locked down in case she got any calls from the wives wondering what was going on. He had tried her house and her cell phone but she hadn't answered. Michael had left a message explaining the situation to her. After hanging up, he called Denise figuring most people would call her if they couldn't reach Jackie.

* * *

Denise had just put Molly down for a nap when she heard her phone ring. She made her way back to her kitchen to get it. "Hello?"

"Denise, it's Michael." He was glad to reach someone.

"Hi Michael. How are you?"

"I'm fine. Listen, I wanted to let you know that the base has been put on lock down. Just in case any of the FRG members call." Michael didn't want to alarm her, but he knew how it went on the base. When something like this happened, there was a potential for people to panic.

"Oh my goodness! What's going on?" Denise sat on one of her bar stools.

"Uh, it's a domestic situation. I don't have all the details, but a distraught soldier was going to different houses and several people called in to the MP's. It's been reported that he may have a weapon. They're looking for him now. The base was locked down just for safety, I don't imagine it will take too long." Michael made sure he stayed calm as he spoke.

Denise was no stranger to these types of things, but locking the base down seemed extreme. Usually they only did that in the event of an active shooter situation. "Oh. Was anyone injured?"

"No, not that I'm aware of. The MP's are just having trouble locating the soldier." Michael paused for a second. "I'll let you know as soon as this is cleared up."

"Ok. Thanks." Before Michael could end the call Denise asked "Did you speak with Jackie?"

"No. I tried to call but she didn't answer. I left a message on her cell phone."

_That's not like Jackie. She always answers her phone, especially when Kevin is deployed. _"Okay. Thanks Michael." Denise set her phone down on the bar. She had spoken with Jackie earlier. They were planning the lunch for the FRG leaders they were hosting the next day and she had been headed out to the PX to get what they needed. _Why isn't she answering? _Denise picked up her phone and called Jackie. Maybe she would answer this time…

* * *

Jackie dropped her phone back in her pocket and stood with her hands up. "Please." She could feel her hands shaking and silently willed herself to stay calm. "Don't shoot."

"You trying to hide from me?" The shooter looked angry. Before Jackie could answer he yelled "Anyone else back here? Come out now!"

Jackie was praying the young woman would stay in the closet like she told her to and that the children would stay quiet. "I'm the only one back here. Everyone else ran out the door." She hoped he would believe her.

The shooter kept his gun pointed at her. "Well, then it looks like I have some company." He motioned her toward the doors while he kept his gun trained on her. "Go."

Jackie slowly walked to the doors and went back into the store. He poked her in the back with the weapon to keep her moving. "Keep walking. We're going to the back of the store away from the doors."

Jackie kept her hands up and continued walking. She heard him grab something as they walked through the household items. She went to turn and look but he poked her again.

"Keep moving! Don't worry about what I'm doing!"

The man led her to the back of the store to the large household appliances. He told her to stop. She heard him set his weapon down and rip something. She turned to see what he was doing and right as she did, he backhanded her across the face. "I told you not to worry what I was doing! Turn around and stand still."

Jackie did what he said. Her lip was burning and she could feel a trickle of blood go down her chin. She would have a busted lip and a nice bruise when this was over with. He roughly grabbed her arms and pulled them behind her. He shoved her against a washing machine. The next thing she felt was some type of electrical chord being wrapped around her wrists. Once her wrists were tied, he turned her around, grasped her shoulders and shoved her to the ground. She landed hard on her knees. He had just picked up his weapon when her cell phone rang again.

He grabbed her jacket and felt the pockets. He pulled out the phone. "Well aren't you Miss popular." Jackie could see Denise's face flashing on her screen.

**TBC**


	3. Chapter 3

After getting off the phone with Denise, Michael was told there were reports of shots being fired at the PX. He left the office and headed in that direction. On his way to the scene he was told the MP's spotted the soldier but, before they could get him stopped, he had run into the PX. Several witnesses reported he had come in firing his weapon at the ceiling and screaming for everyone to get out. They now believed he was barricaded inside. Michael was relieved he had chased everyone out of the store. A lone, barricaded subject, with no hostages, would be easier to handle.

* * *

Denise tried Jackie's home phone first. She was thinking maybe she didn't get the phone earlier because she was carrying groceries in. There was no answer. Denise hung up and called Jackie's cell phone. It rang twice and went straight to voice mail. Denise left a message for Jackie to call her as soon as possible.

Denise was pacing nervously when her cell phone rang. She answered it quickly, hoping it was Jackie. "Hello?"

"Denise, its Michael again. I just wanted to let you know we have the soldier. The base is no longer locked down but we have blocked all access to the area's around the PX-"

"The PX? Oh God." Denise had a sickening feeling in her stomach.

Michael was not expecting her reaction. "What's wrong?"

"Jackie. She was going to the PX when I spoke to her this morning, and now we can't reach her."

"Hold on Denise. Don't assume the worst. From what I'm hearing, the suspect went into the PX and chased everyone out. He's now barricaded himself inside." Michael was just getting on the scene. "I just pulled up here. I'll check it out and get back to you. Okay?"

"Okay. I'm sorry. I'm just worried." Denise felt bad panicking on him.

"No apology necessary. I'll call you soon."

Denise sat down on her couch. _Please, God. Let her be okay._

* * *

The suspect threw her cell phone on top of the washing machine. "Damnit! Why didn't you leave with everyone else?"

Jackie was afraid to look at him. She kept her head down and stayed quiet.

"Hey! I asked you a question!" He grabbed her chin and jerked her head up.

"I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I don't want to make you angry." Jackie felt the tears forming in her eyes.

"Too late! I'm all ready angry!" He shoved her chin away. "Well? Why didn't you leave?"

"I tried. You came through the door before I could, so I hid." Jackie spoke quietly and looked away from him again.

He squatted down beside her and gently touched her cheek. He suddenly looked sad. "I'm sorry I hurt you. I'm not mad at you. I wasn't trying to hurt anyone." He pulled his hand away and sat down leaning up against the washing machine across from her. He sat with his elbows on his knees and let his head fall into his hands.

Jackie was glad he had calmed down but she could see he was emotionally volatile. He had gone from extreme anger to deep sadness in a matter of seconds. "I'm okay." She hoped by saying that it would level out his emotions a bit.

"I just don't know what to do." He kept his head lowered.

She wasn't sure if she should ask or not but "What happened?" She spoke softly. Maybe if she could get him to talk to her, this could end peacefully.

He looked up at her "She left me. I came home and she was gone. She didn't even leave a note." He had tears in his eyes.

Jackie's heart broke for him. She had seen this happen before. The husband is deployed and the wife reaches a breaking point. It had happened in her marriage. She hadn't left. Instead she'd turned to pills. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

"Thank you." He leaned back against the machine and closed his eyes.

Jackie was glad to see he had calmed down. She hoped she could keep him at this level. She knew it would only be a matter of time before the MP's showed up and tried to make contact with him. She needed him to be calm before that happened.

The calm was shattered when her cell phone rang again. The soldier jumped up and yelled at her. "Who the hell keeps calling you?" He grabbed the phone and hit the 'accept call' button. After a few seconds, Jackie could hear Gloria's voice. "Jackie? Jackie are you there?" He didn't say anything and he disconnected the call immediately. He bent down in her face. "So, _Jackie_. Do you always get this many phone calls?"

Jackie cringed away from him. He grabbed her chin and made her look at him. "I asked you a question, _Jackie_."

**TBC**


	4. Chapter 4

**Thanks for the comments! **

Holly had called Gloria in a panic because when she went to leave the apartment to go to the Hump bar, they wouldn't let her leave the base. Gloria's first thought was to call Jackie. As the head of the FRG, she knew Jackie would know what was going on.

Gloria thought it was strange when Jackie clicked on the call, didn't answer her, and then hung up. "That's weird." Gloria figured since she couldn't reach Jackie she would try Denise.

* * *

Denise was in a mad rush to get to the hospital. They had called her in saying there were quite a few injured people on the way to Mercer and they needed all the help they could get. She waited until the sitter arrived and was leaving her house when the phone rang.

"Hello?"

"Denise, it's Gloria. Everything ok? You sound a little flustered."

"Yeah, there's just a lot going on and I got called in to the hospital so I'm rushing to get there."

"Oh I'm sorry, I don't mean to bother you…" Gloria felt bad for catching Denise at a bad time.

"No, no, it's okay. What did you need?" Denise was juggling the phone while she tried to buckle her seat belt.

"I was just trying to find out what's going on. Holly called me all frantic saying she couldn't get off the base."

Denise figured that's what the call would be about. "Yeah, there was an incident a little bit ago, but the base has been reopened. The area by the PX is still blocked off but Holly should be able to leave now."

"Oh, okay. Is everything all right?" Gloria could hear the unease in Denise's voice.

"Uh, yes. The MP's have it under control." Denise hoped that was the case. She hadn't heard from Michael yet and she was scared she was being called in to help with injured people from the PX.

"Okay, sorry to bother you. I tried to call Jackie but-"

"She didn't answer. Yeah, I tried her earlier too." Denise was worried about where Jackie was and whether she was all right.

"No, she answered the phone, but she didn't say anything. Then she just hung up. I figured she must be busy."

Denise was surprised. "She answered her cell phone?"

Gloria didn't understand why Denise was so surprised. "Yeah."

"Okay. I'll try her again in a little bit." Denise needed to call Michael.

"Okay, thanks Denise." Gloria felt as if something wasn't right but she didn't know what to do about it.

"You're welcome Gloria." Denise hung up, immediately pulled up Michael's number, and hit the send button.

* * *

"Denise-" Michael got cut off before he could say anything.

"Michael. Gloria called Jackie and she answered, but then she hung up without saying anything." Denise was speaking quickly.

"I was just about to call you. I got here and found Jackie's car. I have people looking for her but she wasn't in the group that was here. No one remembers seeing her, before or after the soldier came in." Michael felt terrible giving her that news, but he wouldn't lie to her.

"Oh God, Michael. Could she be on the way to the hospital? They called me in and said they had several people coming."

"I doubt it. Most of the injured people are still here. There are no serious injuries, just cuts and bruises and a few broken bones."

"Please call me when you find her? Please?" Denise was really worried. She couldn't handle losing someone else.

"Absolutely I will. If she shows up at the hospital, you call me." Michael hung up and looked around. He hadn't found Jackie anywhere. He hoped to God she wasn't inside the PX.

* * *

Jackie leaned to the side and moved her legs so she could sit on the floor. That helped take the pressure off her knees. The soldier had tossed her phone back on top of the washing machine she was leaning up against. He hadn't said anything else to her since Gloria had called. He had taken to pacing up and down the short aisle they were sitting in.

She knew the MP's had to be in place by now. As quiet as the store was inside, she could hear the hum of activity taking place around the PX. Which meant he could hear it to, which was probably why he was pacing.

He finally sat down across from her. "Your husband deployed?"

Jackie kept her voice quiet. "Yes."

"Where?"

"Afghanistan." She hoped he didn't ask too many questions about Kevin. The last thing she needed was for him to find out she was the General's wife.

"How long?" He wasn't looking at her while they talked. He kept his gaze on the floor.

"A little over a month."

"What do you do when he's deployed? Don't you get lonely?"

Jackie wasn't sure where he was going with this. "I work with the FRG, mostly I just try to keep myself busy. Sometimes it's lonely, but there are other wives here and we get together occasionally."

"Did you ever cheat on your husband?"

"No." Jackie had never so much as thought about being unfaithful to Kevin.

"Good. I'm glad you didn't. It's nice to know some women keep their promises."

"Is that what happened? Your wife had an affair?" Jackie felt even worse for him now.

"I'm pretty sure. People talk. Some of the guys were hearing things from their wives. I asked her about it but she said no. How can I believe that? Especially when I come home and she's gone?"

"I understand. I can see why it would be hard for you to believe her." Jackie didn't want to agree with him. She was afraid he would get upset if she agreed that his wife might have been cheating.

Just as he went to speak again, the MP's called for him over a megaphone. "Brian Campbell. This is the police. We have the PX surrounded. We need you to come out the front door with your hands up."

He jumped up from the floor. "Shit! I didn't want this to happen. Why couldn't they just let me go back to my house?"

Jackie was relieved to hear the MP's. And she was glad to finally know the soldier's name without having to ask him. Maybe she could speak with him on a more personal level and help him understand he needed to give this up and walk outside.

**TBC**


	5. Chapter 5

**Have I lost everybody? :-/**

Denise was just making it into the hospital emergency room when the first few injured people arrived. She saw mostly cuts and bruises. There were a few people with broken bones; a broken ankle from someone jumping off the loading dock and a broken arm from one of the overhead lights in the PX falling on someone. She had finished stitching up a few cuts and wrapping a few sprains before she went to the next patient room.

"Maggie? Latasha? Oh my goodness! You were at the PX?" Denise put her clipboard down and went straight to Maggie. She had a bandage on her head.

Latasha spoke up first. "We had just come in the front doors when some guy came in behind us yelling and shooting at the ceiling. A few of the big fluorescent light fixtures fell. I would have been right under one of them if Maggie hadn't pushed me out of the way."

"Yeah, but I pushed you into a pile of glass." Maggie said as she motioned to Latasha's bandaged arm.

"And banged your head pretty bad in the process." Latasha pointed at the bandage on Maggie's head. "I'll take some stitches in my arm any day over having myself knocked out by that huge light fixture."

Denise looked at Maggie's head wound. "Looks like you'll need a few stitches. Are you dizzy at all? Lose consciousness?" Maggie shook her head no to both. Denise took out a small light and checked her eyes. She saw no abnormal dilation of Maggie's pupils. "It doesn't look like you have a concussion. But you should take it easy for a few days and come back here if you feel dizzy or nauseous at all." Denise stepped away from Maggie and took hold of Latasha's arm. "Looks like you'll need a few stitches also. Are either of you hurt anywhere else?" They both answered no. "Okay. I'll get what I need to fix you up and be right back."

* * *

Brian was getting tired of hearing the MP's yell his name over the megaphone. "Why can't they just leave?" He had paced in the small area for a while and then sat down.

Jackie waited a few minutes until he seemed a little calmer. "They won't leave. They know you're in here…"

"By now they probably know you're in here too."

Jackie thought about that. Her car was in the lot. Except for the woman and her children she had shoved in the closet, everyone else had run out. _'I hope she was able to get out the back door.'_

* * *

Michael was listening to everything that was happening on the scene. He had a speaker wired to the negotiators so he could hear them talk to the suspect if they were ever able to make contact with him. He was also listening to the police radio. He heard when a unit from the perimeter said he had movement on the rear loading dock. Someone shoved two young children through the door. A few seconds later, they had a woman crawling out. They were brought to safety and the woman was interviewed. Michael had been close enough to hear what the woman said.

She explained how a lady had helped her get her children into the back of the store but right as they were about to run for the doors, the suspect came in. The lady had hidden her and her children in a small broom closet and told them not to come out no matter what happened. The woman started crying and said she tried to get the lady to come in with them but she wouldn't because there wasn't enough room. She was asked what happened to the woman and she cried harder when she said the suspect had found her and taken her back into the store with him.

Michael knew who it was before they even had the woman describe her. He had sent someone to get a picture of Jackie. When they showed it to the woman she confirmed it. This changed everything. They would have to be very careful how they handled things now that a hostage was involved. He hoped the suspect hadn't figured out who Jackie was; that she was the General's wife. He was worried that might make things worse.

* * *

Denise was still with Maggie and Latasha when her cell phone vibrated. She pulled it out and saw that it was Michael calling. "Michael? Did you find her?"

"Yeah, we did. She's in the PX with the suspect."

"No!" Denise grabbed the edge of the table. "Oh God! Do you know if she's okay?"

Michael put his hand over his eyes and rubbed them. "We've been trying to make contact with him but he won't answer."

"I'm going to come out there." Denise knew there was nothing she could do there but she felt the need to be close. Someone should be there for Jackie if, no _when _they got her out of there.

"There's nothing you can do here Denise. I'll call you the second I know anything."

"Ok. Thanks." Denise hung up and stared at her phone.

Latasha and Maggie shared a look. Maggie shrugged and Latasha asked "Denise. What's wrong? Who were you talking about?"

Denise took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "Jackie." She looked between the two of them. "She's in the PX with the suspect."

* * *

Brian was still refusing to answer the MP's. If Jackie was honest, she was tired of hearing them yell over the megaphone also. She decided to try to talk to him. He was only a few years older than her son. Maybe she could reach him on a motherly level.

"Brian?" She spoke softly.

He looked up. "Yeah?"

"What are you afraid of?" He just stared at her. "You haven't hurt anyone. You sent everyone out of here."

He shook his head. "I hurt you. Look at you. Your lip is bloody and you're gonna have one hell of a bruise on the side of your face."

"But Brian, you weren't thinking clearly. You thought everyone was gone and then you found me." She kept her voice calm and steady, betraying the panic and anxiety she felt inside. "It's understandable."

"Yeah, right. Tell that to the guys outside." He stood in front of her.

She looked up at him. "I will. I'll tell them exactly that."

He turned and started pacing again. The officer was still yelling over the megaphone.

"Brian you're not a mean person. You apologized for hurting me, and I believe you were sincere." Jackie paused. "You need some help Brian. You've been through a lot and then you come home and your wife is gone. What you're feeling is understandable."

"I don't need help! What I need is for my wife to get her ass back here!" He stood in front of Jackie again. "And I need for you to shut the hell up so I can think!"

Jackie lowered her head. _'He's spiraling down again…' _She knew she needed to be quiet for now.

**TBC**


	6. Chapter 6

**Thanks to those who are reading! **

The MP's hadn't had any success over the megaphone. They knew Brian was hearing them, unless he had earplugs in, there was no way he wasn't. The decision was made to introduce a throw phone into the PX. Maybe they could get him to talk on that and, if not, at least they would have eyes and ears inside. The throw phone was equipped with video and sound. They would be able hear what was going on and if the phone was placed properly, they could see also.

They announced over the megaphone that they were going to deliver a phone to him. Brian was not happy with the idea. They said they would drop the phone in front of the PX doors and he would have to come get it.

Brian was angry and had started pacing again. "What the hell? I don't want to talk to them! I just want to be left alone!"

Jackie sat quietly. She wanted the phone to be delivered. She felt the sooner they made contact with Brian, the sooner she could get out of there.

* * *

Latasha and Maggie had stayed at the hospital. They wanted to know the second Denise heard anything about Jackie. Plus, they lived on the other side of the base, near the PX, and getting home at this point would be a chore.

"I hope they get her out of there quickly. She's probably scared to death."

Maggie thought for a second. "I'm sure she's scared, but Jackie is tougher than you think. She'll be okay."

"I hope you're right." Latasha stood up to stretch just as Denise came into the waiting room. "Have you heard anything?"

Denise shook her head. "Nothing. But, I'm going to go with no news is good news. At least for now."

"Have you heard from Gloria or Holly?" Latasha thought maybe they could all wait together and then be there for Jackie when she got out.

"I spoke with Gloria earlier, but that was before I knew about Jackie. I should probably call her." Denise pulled her phone out.

Latasha took her phone out. "I'll call her."

"Thanks. I'll be able to leave soon. The last of the injured from the PX has been taken care of."

Maggie spoke up. "Do you think we could all get together? Maybe it'll be easier to wait that way. The kids aren't out of school for hours."

Denise nodded her head. "I think that's a great idea. I'll finish up here, you call Gloria and Holly, and we'll meet at my house in 30 minutes."

Before leaving the hospital, Denise put the FRG phone tree in motion. This way no one would call Jackie's phone, since she was at the top of the list and was usually the one who initiated the calls. Denise gave very basic information about the base lock down and that the PX and roads around it would be closed until they got things situated. She didn't tell anyone that Jackie was being held hostage. That needed to be kept quiet.

* * *

Twenty minutes had passed when the MP's announced they were leaving the throw phone right outside the front door. Jackie hoped he would go get it.

Brian was agitated. "Do they think I'm stupid enough to walk out there and get the phone? So they can take me out?"

"You could send me to get it." Jackie offered up.

"So you can get away? Is that it? You want to get away from me, right?" He grabbed her arm and pulled her up to stand.

She squealed at the sudden pain in her arm. "No! That's not it! I just want to help. I-I promise. I'll come back."

"I've got a better idea." He jerked her along in the store. When they got to the front door, he pushed Jackie in front of him. She became his human shield.

* * *

"We have movement inside. Looks like he is coming to get the phone." When Michael heard this, he moved to a position where he could see the door. The officer came over the radio again "He's got the hostage in front of him. All units hold steady."

Michael watched as Brian Campbell unlocked the door and pushed Jackie out in front of the phone. He then grabbed the phone and pulled Jackie by her arm back in with him. She looked scared. Michael could see blood on her shirt and face. He could also see that her hands were tied behind her back. When they got back inside the store, Brian locked the door. As he backed them away, Michael saw Jackie's eyes close and her chin drop. _'Hang in there Jackie. We're going to get you out of there.'_

* * *

Everyone was at Denise's house. Gloria and Holly had come from the Hump bar and brought lunch. They were just sitting down to eat when Denise's phone rang. She saw it was Michael and her stomach muscles tensed.

"Michael?"

"Yeah, it's me. She's still inside, I just wanted you to know that I got a glimpse of her and, physically, she looks okay."

Denise let out the breath she was holding. "What's happening?"

"He has a phone now. So we're hoping we can get him to come out soon, or at least let Jackie out." Michael paused a second. "That information goes no where Denise. Okay?"

"I understand. Thanks for calling. You'll let me know…"

"Of course. The second she's out."

Denise had another thought. "Are you going to call Kevin?"

Michael had been thinking about that. He knew Kevin would want to know, but there was nothing he could do now but worry. "I will, but not yet. I'm hoping I can call and tell him good news when we get her out of there. Until then…"

Denise nodded her head. "I understand Michael. I was thinking the same thing."

"I'll call you when we have her."

* * *

Brian got them back to where they had been sitting. He shoved Jackie against the same washing machine and she slid down to sit on the floor. This was at least more comfortable than being on her knees.

He set the phone down in front of him. He looked at Jackie "Now what?"

"Now you talk to them, explain things. They'll understand Brian. They're all soldiers. Some of them have been in similar relationship situations." Jackie wanted him to talk to them so badly.

They both jumped when the buzzer on the phone sounded. Brian stared at it for a few seconds before answering it. "Hello?"

Jackie took a deep breath. _'Finally. Please talk him out of here.'_

**TBC**


	7. Chapter 7

**The rating has been changed, mainly for language. Hope you're still with me. The shit is about to hit the fan… **

Brian had been on the phone for just over an hour. Jackie stayed quiet and kept her eyes at the floor. She could only hear one side of the conversation, but it didn't seem to be going too badly. It was obvious they were asking him questions about what had happened today and how he ended up here. For the most part, he was answering them and staying calm. Until they asked about Jackie.

"She's fine. You don't need to talk to her." Brian was quiet for a few seconds. "No! She's not coming out! That would be stupid. Then you would just ambush me. She's what's keeping you out of here right now." He sat back against the washing machine and shook his head. "She's going to stay with me until I decide what to do next." He was quiet again. "I'm not going to hurt her!"

Jackie raised her head slightly to see him looking at her.

He was staring right at her face. "That was an accident. And she's not bleeding now." He listened again. "I'm done talking about this. She's not coming out!" Brian hung up the phone. It started buzzing almost immediately, but he refused to answer it.

* * *

Michael was sitting where he could hear what was happening inside the PX. The video feed was useless because the phone was sitting next to the suspect and the camera was faced toward his leg. Jackie had been quiet, which was smart. The last thing they needed was for her to try to work things out. The negotiator needed to be able to communicate with Brian without interference.

* * *

The buzzing was driving Brian crazy. "Damnit! Quit fucking calling!" He picked up the receiver and slammed it down several times. Then he tried leaving it off the hook. It buzzed anyway. "Arrrrrgggghhh!" He stood up and paced some more. "I can't think with that thing buzzing!" He sat in front of Jackie. "What should I do?"

Jackie stared at him. It was like he was coming down again. He was up and down like a roller coaster. "I don't know, Brian. Maybe if you ask them for a few minutes of quiet..." She stopped herself. Why would she tell him that? She looked back at the floor.

* * *

Michael heard the conversation between Jackie and Brian. The negotiations commander suggested they allow him some quiet time in exchange for putting Jackie on the line so they could check in with her. Michael agreed with him. With Jackie suggesting Brian ask for quiet time, having the request honored could keep her safer longer.

* * *

Brian answered the phone. "What?" He listened. "I understand that, but I can't think with this damn thing buzzing." He looked over at Jackie. "I need you to give me some quiet time to think." Brian seemed as if he was contemplating something. "I want at least 20 minutes." He looked back at Jackie. "Okay. I'll let her talk to you, but I'm listening in."

Brian picked up the phone and moved to sit down beside Jackie. He placed the phone next to her ear and nodded at her. "Hello?"

"Hello Ma'am. This is Jeff. I just wanted to check in with you. Are you okay?"

Jackie looked at Brian. He nodded at her again. "Yes."

"Are you hurt at all?"

Jackie shook her head, as she answered "No."

"Okay. We're working on getting you both out of there safely. You just hang in there ok?"

"Ok." Brian took the phone away from her ear.

"I get my 20 minutes of quiet now right?"

* * *

Brian had moved the phone when he let Jackie talk. The MP's could see both of them on the video feed now. They also had a better idea where they were in the store. The special ops team was all ready diagramming the PX and preparing for an assault should that become necessary.

After 20 minutes had passed, the negotiator called back in. Brian answered the phone. He seemed a lot calmer now. He talked for almost 2 hours. The negotiator did a good job of keeping him calm. Occasionally Brian would hang up if he was pushed too hard but he always answered when they called back in.

Brian asked them to find his wife and bring her there. They had made contact with her earlier, but there was no way they would bring her there. They might tell him they had-but they wouldn't put her in harm's way like that. They had explained the consequences of his actions to him. He hadn't caused any loss of life and they played that up significantly. He had done some damage to the PX and he was told he would have charges pending for that, which he understood.

* * *

Denise, Gloria, and Holly were still waiting at Denise's house. Latasha and Maggie had to leave to pick up their kids from school. They had plans to come back after getting the kids settled in and having Caroline watch them.

It had been a while since Michael had contacted her and Denise was getting worried. She thought the whole thing would be over by now. As if he was reading her mind, Michael called.

Denise jumped up and got her phone from the kitchen island. "Michael? What's going on?"

"They're still inside. It seems like he's calming down. I'm hopeful this will be over with very soon."

"Oh thank God. Please call me right away? I want to be there for Jackie when she gets out of there."

"I will Denise. I promise."

* * *

Things were going well. Brian seemed nearly ready to come out. And then everything went to hell quick when Jackie's phone rang.

It irritated Brian. He got up and grabbed it off the washing machine. He answered quickly without looking at the caller ID. "What?"

There was nothing for a few seconds. "Hello? Jackie?"

Jackie could hear Kevin's voice. "Oh God." She dropped her chin to her chest. _'Please Kevin. Please don't say who you are.'_

Brian looked at Jackie. "Nope, not Jackie."

"Who is this? Where is Jackie?" Kevin was shocked and confused.

"She's right here with me. Who is this?"

"This is General Clarke; her husband! Who the hell are you?"

Brian's eyes got wide. "What?" He looked at Jackie. "You're the General's wife?" He threw the phone at the floor and it shattered. "Oh my God! You're the fucking General's wife!" He grabbed his head and paced back and forth.

Jackie tried to calm him down. "Brian it doesn't mean anything. It doesn't matter who my husband is. Please! Listen to me!"

Brian picked up his weapon and pointed it.

Jackie screamed. "No! No, no, no, no! Please don't do that! Please don't!" She closed her eyes and leaned forward. "Noooooo!"

Michael stared in horror at the video monitor. "Get in there! NOW!"

They heard a single shot fired.

**TBC**


	8. Chapter 8

**There are a few graphic things mentioned in this chapter. I don't want to ruin the suspense by telling you what they are… But, please take care of yourselves if something mentioned here bothers you. **

Michael watched on the video screen. He could see Jackie, but she wasn't moving. He couldn't see the suspect. _'Come on Jackie. Move. Please.' _He heard the special ops team breach the front doors. Jackie flinched at the sound of the breaking glass. He saw her slowly raise her head up. _'Oh, thank God.'_ She looked horror stricken. She was staring straight ahead and he could see her trembling. It was obvious that she was in shock.

* * *

Jackie's ears were ringing. Everything seemed to be going in slow motion. She was looking at Brian, but she couldn't see his face. He had slumped forward. What she could see caused her stomach to lurch. She tried to move, but her body wouldn't cooperate. She couldn't stop looking at what used to be Brian's head. She realized someone was talking to her, but she couldn't bring herself to respond. Her hands were untied and she felt someone gently lift her up. She tried to stand but her knees wouldn't support her. She felt dizzy and then she felt nothing.

* * *

Kevin was frantically calling Jackie's phone but the call wasn't going through. After the fourth try, his phone started ringing. He saw that it was Michael calling. "Michael-"

"She's safe Kevin. We have her and she's safe."

"What the hell is going on? What happened?"

Michael explained the situation to Kevin and promised he would get Jackie on the phone as soon as he could get to her. When he finished talking with Kevin, he called Denise.

"Michael, please tell me you have her."

"We have her. She's safe. They're putting her in the ambulance now."

"Ambulance?" Denise walked over to the couch where Gloria and Holly were sitting. "What happened? Is she hurt badly?"

"I think she's in shock. She does have a few bumps and bruises, but for the most part she's okay. They're going to be taking her to Mercer."

"Oh thank God." Denise let out the breath she had been holding. "I'm going to meet you there."

"Ok. I'll see you shortly."

Denise gave Gloria and Holly the good news. Then she called her sitter while Gloria called Latasha. They all agreed to meet at Mercer.

* * *

Jackie came to in the ambulance. She was confused at first. Then everything that happened hit her like a ton of bricks. She tried to sit up but couldn't. Her arms were trapped at her sides. This sent her into a panic.

The medic put his hand on her shoulder in an attempt to calm her. He got right in front of her so she could see his face. "Mrs. Clarke it's okay. You're in the ambulance. You're safe."

She flinched and continued to panic. "I'm going to be sick." She struggled to get her arms free. The medic released the strap as he grabbed a bag. Jackie pulled her arms out and grabbed the bag. There was nothing in her stomach and she began dry heaving. The medic was trying to calm her but her stomach wouldn't stop and her heart rate was increasing steadily. The other medic grabbed a sedative and injected it into her IV.

Jackie felt like things were slowing down. Her vision went gray around the edges and then she was out.

* * *

Denise went to the Emergency Room as soon as she got to the hospital. She found Jackie in one of the treatment rooms. Dr. Seaver was just coming out.

"Dr. Seaver, how is she?"

"Are you still working Denise?" He walked to the nurse's desk. "I thought you went home hours ago."

Denise followed him. "I did. But, I'm back. Jackie's a close friend and…"

He turned toward her. "She's okay. She's got a busted lip and a few mean bruises, but over all she was very lucky. She was in shock at the scene and blacked out. She came to in the ambulance and went straight into a panic attack. They couldn't get her calmed down and her heart rate shot up. They had to sedate her on the way here."

"Oh my…" Denise couldn't help but think about the emotional distress Jackie would be in when she woke up.

"You can go in. The nurse was getting her into a gown and getting her settled. We're going to keep her overnight. Just as a precaution."

"Ok. Thanks." Denise walked back over to the treatment room. The nurse was just getting Jackie's gown on. Her discarded clothes were on the chair next to the bed. Denise could see blood on her shirt and a significant amount of blood splatter and what looked like brain matter on her pants and shoes. She felt her stomach flip. '_Oh Jackie.'_

Denise approached just as the nurse covered Jackie up. The nurse took Jackie's clothing and put it in a paper bag to give to the MP's. She nodded at Denise, took the bag of clothing and left the room.

Jackie looked pale, which made the bruises on her arms and wrists appear even darker. The right side of her lip was swollen and her jaw had an ugly bruise forming. She took a hold of Jackie's hand and squeezed gently. It was obvious her hands had been tied. Denise could see the ligature marks.

* * *

Michael came into the hospital through the emergency entrance with the MP investigators. They were there to pick up Jackie's clothes. He saw Denise in one of the treatment rooms and headed that way.

Denise was holding Jackie's hand with one of her hands and had her other hand over her own mouth. Michael heard her sniffle as he came in. He could see she was feeling emotional. He spoke quietly so he wouldn't startle her. "Denise?"

She turned. "Hey." Once he walked closer she said quietly "what happened in there, Michael? I saw her clothing. There was _brain matter_ on her pants."

"The soldier killed himself Denise." He paused and took a deep breath. "Right in front of her."

Denise gasped. "Why? What went wrong?"

Michael shook his head. "He found out she was the General's wife and he freaked out."

"How?" Denise knew Jackie was smarter than to tell the guy who she was.

"Kevin called her phone and the suspect answered. It wasn't pretty." Michael looked down at Jackie. "This sounds awful, I know, but I'm going to say it anyway. I feel for that soldier, but I'm glad he turned the gun on himself. I was scared he was going to shoot her-it really could have gone either way Denise. He was up and down all afternoon. He just happened to be in a calm, depressive state when the call came. If he had still been in the manic, out of control state he bounced in and out of all day…" Michael paused. "I hate to even think."

"My God." Denise looked back at Jackie. "This is going to be so hard for her to deal with. She's going to blame herself. I know her."

Michael nodded to himself in agreement. "I need to call Kevin back. When I talked to him before, he was going crazy. I told him I would have Jackie call as soon as I got to her. He'll be waiting. How long will she be out?"

"At least a few hours. She panicked in the ambulance. They had to sedate her."

"Yeah. The doctor told me. The investigators need to speak with her too. I told them I'd call them tomorrow and set something up. She needs a little time to deal with this before she goes through that."

"Thank you Michael." Denise gently put Jackie's hand by her side. She backed away from the bed.

They walked to the doorway together. Once in the hall they stopped. "I'm going to go meet the other wives in the lobby and let them know what's going on."

"Okay. I need to go call Kevin. I'll meet you out there in a few minutes." Michael took out his phone and walked away.

Denise headed to the lobby.

**TBC**

**Suicide is an awful thing. I hope this didn't upset anyone reading it. I have much experience in dealing with people taking their own lives-both personally and professionally-and I know it can be an upsetting topic. That being said, suicide is a problem with the military population. **

**If you, or someone you know, are feeling suicidal, please get help. There are hotlines you can call and people who will listen to and help you. Suicidal feelings are nothing to be ashamed of. Many people experience them. There is help out there… **


	9. Chapter 9

**I never told you the time line for this story! Thanks to cncgrad02 for pointing that out to me. It takes place after Claudia Joy's memorial (S7E9) but before 'Reckoning' (S7E10). Gloria has not yet received Pat's letter breaking up with her.**

Kevin answered on the first ring. "Jackie?"

"No, Kevin. It's Michael."

"What's wrong? Is Jackie okay?" Kevin had been waiting to hear something for almost two hours. It was nearly 1:00 AM in Afghanistan.

"She's okay-"

"But what? Where is she?"

"She's in the hospital Kevin." Michael felt so bad having to tell Kevin this over the phone. He knew what it was like to be deployed and have no control over anything that was happening at home. He couldn't imagine ever getting a call about Claudia Joy like the one he was making to Kevin now about Jackie.

"The hospital? Why? I thought you said she was okay?"

"For the most part, she is. Look Kevin, I'm not going to 'sugar coat' this. That soldier killed himself right in front of her. She was in shock on the scene and she blacked out. Evidently she came to in the ambulance and went into a panic attack. They had to sedate her."

"Oh God." Kevin's head fell into his hand. He felt so helpless.

* * *

Denise approached the group in the lobby. As soon as they saw her, they all got up and walked toward her. Denise was surprised to see Roland there. In all the craziness she had forgotten to call him.

"Roland. I'm so sorry I didn't call you."

"It's okay Denise. It sounds like you've been pretty busy today. Joan told me as soon as she found out." Roland took Denise's hand. "How is she?"

"Let's sit." Denise led them to the couches and answered once everyone was seated. "She's sedated right now. She blacked out before they could get her out of the PX. She came around in the ambulance, but she panicked so they sedated her."

Gloria was the first to get a question in. "Was she hurt? I heard there was a gun shot."

Denise looked at Roland asking him with her eyes what she should say. He spoke up. "From what Joan said, the soldier committed suicide. That was the gun shot."

Latasha spoke next. "Oh my goodness. Where was Jackie when that happened? Was she all ready out?"

"No. They didn't get to her until after…" Denise was watching their reactions.

Maggie figured it out first. "Wait, so, Jackie was right there when he killed himself? He did it in front of her?"

"Yes." Denise nodded and then looked at the floor. They were all quiet for a few seconds, each processing what they were being told.

Holly spoke quietly. "Oh my gosh, poor Jackie. I can't even imagine…"

"They're going to keep her overnight, just as a precaution. I doubt she'll be up for any visitors though." Denise looked around at them hoping they understood what she was trying to say. "If everything is okay, they should let her go home in the morning."

"Do you think we could go see her at home tomorrow? I mean, you guys know her better" Latasha looked at Denise, Roland and Gloria. "Would she be okay with that?"

Denise thought for a second "I'm sure she would be fine with it. I have to be here in the morning. I'll see how she's doing and find out what time she'll be leaving, then I'll call you."

Maggie answered "Okay. That sounds good."

They all got up and, after hugging each other, started out the door. Maggie, Latasha, and Holly left first. Gloria stayed back. She wanted to talk to Denise. Denise stopped Roland and asked if he would wait.

Gloria pulled Denise aside. "Are you going to stay with her? Because, I know you have Molly and everything and I don't mind staying."

"I'm going to stay at least until she wakes up. I can keep the sitter for a few more hours. I'd just need to be home by 8:00 to put Molly to bed."

"Denise, I don't want her to be alone. Would they let me stay with her? I promise, I won't get in the way. It's just that Jackie helped me out so much with Hector and the divorce and she's been so good about me and Pat-"

Denise smiled at Gloria and took her hands. "Whoa, slow down! She's going to be fine Gloria. She wasn't seriously physically injured." _'Not like Penny.' _Denise knew Gloria was struggling with the young woman's death.

"I know what you're thinking, Denise. She's not Penny and that wasn't my fault, I know that. I care about Jackie. Kevin and Patrick are both deployed. I want to be there for her."

"Okay. I can see where they're putting her, if she's in a private room, which is likely, then I don't see a problem with it."

"Oh, good." Gloria squeezed Denise's hands. "I need to go check on things at the Hump. It's 4:30, I'll be back around 7:30. That way I'll be here before you leave and she won't be alone."

Denise gave Gloria a hug. "Thanks Gloria." They smiled at each other and then Gloria left.

Denise walked over to Roland. He spoke as she walked up. "You don't have to ask Denise. I know they'll want her to be seen by a psychiatrist before they let her leave. I spoke to the head of the department and he said it would be fine for me to do the evaluation."

"Oh, thank you." She hugged Roland. "Will you see her in the morning?"

"Yes. I'll come in right after I get the kids off. I'm going to head home now. Call me if you need anything, okay?"

"Okay, thanks again." Denise watched as Roland left the hospital.

Just as she turned around, Michael walked up. "Did you reach Kevin?"

Michael nodded. "Yes. He's upset. I told him I'd stay here until Jackie woke up so he could talk to her."

"But, Michael" She looked at her watch. "Isn't it nearly 1 in the morning over there?"

"Yes, but there was no arguing with him. He's worried about her, Denise. Can't say I wouldn't feel the same way."

"I know, but…" She paused for a second. "I'm sorry, we wives are just so conditioned not to let any troubles from home find their way over there. Jackie will be upset if she thinks she put any extra worry on Kevin."

"I understand Denise. It really can't be helped." Michael looked around. "She won't be awake for a bit yet. Let's grab a cup of coffee or something while they get her settled into her room. Then we can go up."

* * *

Jackie saw the gun as he put it under his chin. He looked at her and then closed his eyes. She looked away, but she heard the shot and felt warmth spray her… She screamed. "Noooo!"

She sat up in the hospital bed and kicked off the blankets. In her mind, she could see pieces of Brian's brain on her and she frantically started kicking.

* * *

Denise and Michael had just turned the corner in the hallway when they heard the scream. They both ran to the room. Denise made it through the door first and saw Jackie kicking her legs and then scooting up the bed as if she wanted climb into the headboard.

She went to Jackie and put her hand on her shoulder. "Jackie. Jackie!" At first touch, Jackie jerked away. Denise grabbed her arms. "It's Denise! Look at me!"

Jackie looked up and saw Denise. "Denise." Then her head dropped to her knees, which were curled up in front of her, and she sobbed. Denise sat on the bed and put her arms around Jackie, hugging her tightly.

Michael backed out of the room just as the nurse was rushing in. They shared a look and then the nurse pulled the door shut behind them as they left.

**TBC**


	10. Chapter 10

**Thank you so much for all the reviews and support. I'm into the difficult part of the story now. The gritty facts are easy to write, the emotional fall out is much trickier…**

Denise sat with Jackie for several minutes while she sobbed. Finally Jackie pulled away slightly. "I'm sorry."

"Jackie. Please. Do not apologize to me." Denise took Jackie's hand. Her voice broke when she spoke. "I'm so happy you're okay. When I heard you were in there, I was so scared for you." She pushed Jackie's hair behind her ear and looked at the ugly bruise still forming on her jaw. "Are you in any pain?"

Jackie sniffled. "No. I'm fine." She looked around. "How long have I been here?"

Denise saw how she claimed to be fine and then changed the subject. Jackie had pulled that on her before. A year ago when Denise asked about the pills she was taking. She knew better than to believe Jackie, but she wouldn't challenge her for now. "A few hours. Do you remember being in the ambulance?"

Jackie thought hard and slowly shook her head. "Not really. I guess I passed out?"

"Yes. You came to in the ambulance and panicked. They gave you a sedative."

Jackie looked around. "I'm not in the Emergency room. Why?"

"The doctor wants to keep you overnight, just as a precaution." Denise was getting ready for the fight that would come next.

Jackie climbed out of the bed and pulled the hospital gown tightly around her. "No. That's not necessary." She turned to face Denise. "I feel fine. I think I can handle a busted lip on my own."

Denise stood up in front of her. "Jackie. You've been through something very traumatic. You had a full-blown panic attack in the ambulance. The doctor just wants to make sure-"

Jackie ignored her and went to the small closet in the room. She opened it to find it empty. "Where are my clothes?" She turned around to Denise waiting for an answer.

"Your clothes were given to the investigators." She walked to Jackie and took her hands again. "Jackie, please. Just sit down-"

"Denise, no." Jackie pulled her hands away. "I want to go home. I need to go home." She paused and then looked at Denise with wide eyes. "Oh my God. Kevin. He called… I need to call Kevin!"

Denise put her hands on both of Jackie's shoulders to get her attention. "Michael called Kevin. He knows you're safe."

Jackie started shaking, her eyes got teary, and she wrapped her arms around her middle. Denise saw that she was close to losing it again. "Please. Just sit down here for a few minutes." She angled Jackie toward the bed and helped her to sit. Denise sat next to her. After a few minutes, Denise spoke. "Michael is here. He spoke to Kevin a little while ago and told him you would call once you could talk to him."

Jackie took a deep breath and sat up straighter. "What did Michael tell him?"

"Well, he told him what happened and that you were in the hospital."

"Oh God." Jackie crumpled over and put her head in her hands. "He doesn't need to worry like that Denise."

"I understand, believe me. But Michael didn't want to lie to him and Kevin knew something was wrong, so…" Denise held on to Jackie's forearm and squeezed.

"He needs to know that I'm okay. I need to go home Denise. If I'm going home, he'll know everything is okay." Jackie was pleading with Denise.

"Jackie, he all ready knows about the panic attack and that they want to keep you over night."

"Ugh." Jackie ran her hands through her hair in frustration. "I'm doing what I swore I would never do Denise."

"I know, but it couldn't be helped." She squeezed Jackie's arm again. "It _will_ be okay Jackie. We'll get you on the phone with him and he'll hear that you're doing fine." Denise bent forward to catch Jackie's eye. "It'll be okay."

Jackie looked at her and nodded as if she was trying to convince herself that what Denise had said was true. "Okay." She took a deep breath and let it out slowly.

* * *

When Denise brought Michael back in the room, Jackie was standing and staring out the window. She had wrapped a blanket around her shoulders. She didn't appear to know they were there. Denise approached her and spoke softly. "Jackie?"

Jackie jumped slightly and turned to Denise. "Hey." She saw Michael and walked toward him. "Michael. Thank you for calling Kevin."

"You're very welcome, it was no problem." He gave her a brief hug and then held onto her shoulders. "I'm so sorry this happened to you. If you need anything…" Michael didn't know what else to say. He knew she wasn't happy to be stuck in the hospital and Denise had said she was upset that he had told Kevin she would be staying over night.

Suddenly Jackie remembered the young woman and her two children. "There was a woman, with her kids, in the back-"

"They're fine. They got out shortly after we got there." Michael slid his hands down to Jackie's forearms.

Jackie's shoulders relaxed and she nodded at him. _'Thank God they got out okay.' _It was obvious she was trying not to get too emotional.

"You protected them Jackie. That woman is very grateful." He squeezed her arms and then let go. He pulled his phone out, pulled up Kevin's number, and handed it to her. "You ready to call?"

"Yes." She took the phone from him. "Thanks."

"I'll be in the hall. Take your time." Michael headed out the door.

Denise stood beside Jackie. "Do you want me to stay or…"

"No. I'll be fine." Denise went to turn and walk out but Jackie grabbed her arm. "Thank you. Really."

"No thanks necessary." Denise squeezed Jackie's hand then turned and left the room.

* * *

Jackie sat in the chair beside the bed and stared at the phone. She swallowed once, took a deep breath, and hit the call button.

Kevin answered on the first ring. "Jackie?"

Jackie felt her heart swell and her eyes get moist just at hearing his voice. "Yes, it's me."

"Oh God, it's good to hear your voice. I've been so worried."

"It's good to hear your voice too. I'm sorry for worrying you." She was barely holding in her emotions.

"Jackie, no apologies please. I'm just so damn glad you're safe." His voice cracked with emotion.

When Jackie heard the break in his voice she couldn't help the sob that escaped.

"I wish I was there to help you. I'm so sorry I'm not." Kevin had his head in his hand as he leaned over his desk.

"Kevin, it's okay. I'm okay." She wiped the tears from her face.

"I can hear you're not okay. I wouldn't expect you to be after what you've been through." He knew his wife. She would be stubborn about this. She always kept everything in check while he was away so she wouldn't worry him. "I need you to let people help you, Jackie. Can you do that for me?"

"Kevin, you don't need to worry. I'm fine-"

"Hon, you're not fine. I talked to Michael. I know what you went through. I know they want you to stay in the hospital tonight and I know you'll fight them on that. I need you to not fight it. I'll feel better knowing that you're safe, and that you're being cared for."

"I understand that, but I would feel so much safer at home, locked in our house-"

"Jackie. It's not just about safety. You had a panic attack, and I know you feel calm now, but I would feel better if a doctor was around just in case it happens again." He hoped he was getting through to his stubborn wife. "Please? For me?"

"Kevin…" She was torn. She didn't want to stay there, but she had all ready caused him so much worry. "Okay. Just for tonight. But, then I'm going home."

"Thank you." Kevin let out a breath in relief. "I talked to Michael about replacing your cell phone. He's going to take care of that. I'll call you tomorrow morning to check in. Okay?"

"Okay." She wiped another tear away and sniffled quietly.

"I love you Jackie-" His voice was breaking again.

Jackie heard the emotion in his voice and she covered her mouth to stifle the sob that was trying to get out.

"-and I can't wait to get back there to hold you and take care of you." A tear slipped down Kevin's cheek. He swiped it away. He hated feeling so helpless and he was afraid for Jackie, for so many reasons.

Jackie took a deep breath before responding "I love you too. And I can't wait for you to come home." More tears fell.

"I'll call you in the morning. Please try to get some rest, okay?"

"I'll try. You don't need to worry about me. I'm going to be fine." Jackie was nodding to herself.

"I know you will. I love you."

"Love you too."

As soon as they disconnected, Jackie wrapped her arms around herself while tears slid down her face.

Halfway around the world, Kevin set his phone down and rubbed his eyes. He had never wanted to go home so badly.

**TBC**

**Not quite sure I'm satisfied with the Jackie/Kevin phone conversation. They have had so little positive interaction on the show it's hard to judge how it would go. I hope it didn't sound too farfetched…**


	11. Chapter 11

**Thanks for the reviews! **

Denise had gotten Jackie settled back in the hospital bed. The phone call with Kevin had helped with getting her to agree to stay overnight. Denise was sitting in the chair next to the bed. She could see how exhausted Jackie was, but she refused to lie down. Denise was sure she was scared of what she would see in her dreams. The nightmare she had woken from earlier was a bad one. She had tried, without success, to get Jackie to talk about it.

"You look tired Jackie. Why don't you try to get some sleep?"

"It's early yet. If I sleep now, I'll be up all night. Besides, I have company now." Jackie smiled at her. She knew there was no chance she would willingly go to sleep tonight. That nightmare from earlier still had her mind twisted.

Dinner had been brought in but Jackie took one look at the food and her stomach clenched. She didn't tell Denise, but all she could see when she looked at the tray was blood and brain matter. She pushed the food around a little so it wouldn't appear untouched, then covered it up, and pushed the tray stand away from the bed.

Michael had brought a new phone in for her. The AT&T store had been able to get her data off the destroyed phone, so she had all her contact information. He had placed his number on speed dial and told her to call if she needed anything. He said he would get with her the next morning about the appointment time for her to give her statement to the MP's. He had also insisted on driving her there. She tried to put up a fuss, but then he reminded her she didn't have her car because it was still at the PX. So they agreed that he would pick her up from the hospital for her interview and then take her to get her car. Jackie hated having to depend on him but she didn't really have a choice.

After Michael left, Jackie told Denise she felt bad that he was doing all this for her. "I feel like I'm putting him out. I could just catch a cab to my car."

"I think Michael is enjoying having someone around that needs him. I mean think about it, Claudia Joy is gone and Emmalin is away at school. Plus, if anything had ever happened to Claudia Joy he would have wanted her to be taken care of while he wasn't here. He's making sure his General in combat has less to be worried about."

"You always have a way of putting things into perspective." It was quiet for a few moments.

"I was going to go by your place in the morning on my way here to get some clothes for you to change into. Anything special you'd like me to bring?"

"No. Jeans and any shirt hanging in the closet will do. If you could grab my black Toms that are on the floor in the closet, that would be great." Jackie looked around. "Is my purse here somewhere? You'll need the house key."

Denise reached into her pocket and pulled out Jackie's keys. "I have the keys. I put your purse in the bottom drawer of the bedside table."

"Thank you Denise, for everything, but you can go home now. You don't need to hang around. Molly is at home, you should go." Jackie was doing her best to persuade Denise that she was fine.

"Molly is fine. I'll be home in time to put her to bed." Denise stood and walked to Jackie's bedside. "Jackie, I need you to promise me something."

Jackie squinted slightly at her, not sure what she was going to ask. "Okay, if I can."

"I need you to not shut me out. Don't tell me you're fine when I know better." She watched as Jackie started to protest and stopped her before she could. "You are going to need support in dealing with this. I know you're tough and I also know you are the master at pretending everything is fine and putting on a happy face."

Jackie had tried to interrupt her but Denise had kept talking and she couldn't get a word in until she had finished. "Denise. I won't lie and say I'm fine right now. But, I will be okay. I just need a few days to let my thoughts process."

Denise grabbed her hand and sat on the edge of the bed next to her. "It's going to take more than a few days to recover from this Jackie. I'm worried about you. If you have PTSD symptoms that overwhelm you, I need you to promise that you will talk to someone about it. It doesn't have to be me, although I would be honored if you wanted to share with me."

Jackie was getting choked up at what Denise was saying. She had very few friends she had opened up to about anything and Denise had been one of those people. "I'll be careful, Denise. You don't have to worry. I'm not going to fall back on pills. I'm stronger than that now."

"I'm not really worried about the pills Jackie. I want you to let people help you; let me help you."

Jackie looked down and away. "Denise-"

"You need people now Jackie. Don't push them away." Denise knew unless she kept her eye on her, Jackie would shut everyone out.

"Okay, okay." Jackie looked back at Denise. "I hear you. I do."

Denise looked at her watch. It was almost 7:30. Gloria should be here any time. "Do you want me to call Sophie for you?"

"No! She doesn't need to know about this. It will just upset her." Jackie was shaking her head vehemently.

"She's almost 17, Jackie. She could be a big support-"

"No Denise. If she was here maybe, but she's at Exeter. She has finals coming up and she doesn't need the distraction." Jackie wouldn't give on this. She didn't want Patrick to know either. She knew Kevin wouldn't tell him. He would understand not giving Patrick anything more to worry about while he was in combat.

"Okay. It's your decision."

* * *

Gloria came in just after 7:30 carrying a large bag. She rushed right to Jackie and grabbed her into a big hug. "I'm so glad you're okay!"

Jackie was taken by surprise. "Oh!"

Gloria backed away quickly. "Oh my God! I'm sorry! Did I hurt you?"

"No! You just surprised me." Jackie smiled at Gloria. She admired this young woman. She was tough as nails on the outside, but had a heart of gold.

Gloria smiled at her. "You gave us a scare. We were all so worried." She looked over at Denise. "I'm sorry I'm a few minutes late. I stopped by the store." She grabbed her bag up and plopped it on the bed next to Jackie.

Jackie looked at Denise. "Late?"

Denise didn't know what to say. "Uh, well, um…" She hadn't told Jackie that Gloria was coming to stay the night. She was thinking now that wasn't such a good idea.

"Yeah. I told Denise I would be here by 7:30 so she could get home to get Molly to bed. But, I went to the store to get us some supplies for tonight and I got caught up in the express lane by this lady in front of me who obviously couldn't count 'cause she had way more than 15 items." Gloria started pulling things out of the bag.

Jackie had a bewildered look on her face. "Supplies? For tonight?"

"Yeah. I'm staying here tonight. I didn't want you to be alone." Gloria didn't stop pulling items out to look at Jackie.

Jackie looked at Denise with wide eyes. "What?"

**TBC**

**I'm getting caught up in the interactions with the characters. I hope that doesn't bore anyone… It's definitely stringing the story out a bit!**


	12. Chapter 12

Denise deflected Jackie's question and began pointing things out that Gloria had brought with her. Playing cards, magazines, a coloring book of fancy designs with a pack of colored pencils, and junk food.

Jackie sat watching them with her mouth hanging open. She didn't really want company tonight. She needed time to think about what had happened, and she didn't really want an audience for that. She doubted she would sleep and, if she did manage to, she was sure there would be nightmares. She was embarrassed enough when Denise had found her screaming, she didn't need for Gloria to see that.

"Jackie?" Denise had said her name twice before she turned to look at her. "I'm going to head home now. I'll stop by your place in the morning to get your clothes."

Jackie nodded at her. "Okay."

Denise bent down and gave her a hug. While they were hugging she whispered in Jackie's ear. "She wanted to stay with you. She's concerned and she cares about you." Denise backed away.

Jackie was surprised by what Denise whispered. It touched her heart, but it didn't stop her from being embarrassed. She felt her eyes get teary. "Thank you Denise. I appreciate it."

Denise smiled. "Good night ladies. I'll see you in the morning."

* * *

Gloria finished unpacking the bag and had moved the reclining chair so it was beside the bed. "I hope you're okay with me staying here."

Jackie smiled. "It's fine Gloria. I'm touched that you care so much."

"I do Jackie. I think you're really sweet." She thought for a minute. "You don't let people get too close do you?"

Jackie stuttered a bit before she managed to ask. "What makes you say that?"

"I don't know. I could be wrong, but it just seems like you don't let too many people in. Like you're afraid for people to know you 'cause you think they won't like you or something." Gloria picked up the deck of cards and opened them. "You're a good person Jackie. Everybody is talking about how you helped that woman and her kids today. You're tough and you're gutsy. I admire that."

"Thank you Gloria. That's very sweet of you to say." Jackie was looking down. She felt glad she could help that young woman and her kids. But she couldn't help but feel terrible that she wasn't able to save that soldier.

Gloria saw Jackie's face change. "It wasn't your fault you know?" She waited for Jackie to look up at her. "It was his choice to do what he did. You're not responsible for that."

Jackie took in a quick breath. She was surprised Gloria was able to read her so easily. "I know but…" Jackie looked up at the ceiling trying to keep her tears at bay. "I just, I wish I…"

Gloria stood up and took Jackie's hand as she sat on the bed beside her. "I know. I'm so sorry you went through that. But you can't blame yourself."

Jackie felt a few tears leak out. She wiped them away quickly. "I know." Jackie pointed at the deck of cards. "What do you want to play?"

Gloria realized Jackie was purposely changing the subject. "Jackie, if you want to talk about it, I'm here, okay?" Jackie nodded. Gloria didn't want to push any more. "Spoons?"

Jackie looked confused. "Spoons?"

Gloria laughed. "It's a card game! You never heard of spoons?"

Jackie laughed. "No, I sure haven't."

"Well, you're about to learn!" She pulled the bed tray over and started setting the game up.

* * *

By 11:00, they had played cards, taken the quizzes in Cosmo, and colored design patterned pictures. Jackie could barely hold her eyes open but refused to lie down.

She was staring at the TV but it was obvious she wasn't watching it.

Gloria was just about to tell Jackie she should try to get some sleep when the nurse came in.

"Mrs. Clarke, how are you feeling?"

Jackie was staring straight ahead and didn't even realize the nurse had come into the room.

"Mrs. Clarke?" She stopped beside the bed and waited for Jackie to look at her. "You okay?"

Jackie nodded her head. "I'm fine." Jackie saw the small pill cup in the nurse's hand felt her anxiety ratchet up. "What's that?"

She held up the small cup. "It's a little something the doctor prescribed to help you sleep."

Jackie immediately spoke up. "No. No, I don't' need anything to help me sleep. I'm really fine."

"It's nothing too strong. It will just help you relax." The nurse went to the water pitcher on the bedside table and poured a glass of water. "It's not unusual for someone who has been through something traumatic to have trouble sleeping. The doctor wanted to make sure you were relaxed enough to get some much needed rest."

Jackie shook her head. "I don't need that. I'm fine."

Gloria could see how worked up Jackie was getting. She knew about Jackie's fight with pills. "Does she have to take that? Couldn't she just wait and see if she needs it?"

The nurse looked between the two of them. She wasn't sure what was going on but she didn't want to force the pill if the patient didn't want it. She smiled and patted Jackie's forearm. "Okay. If you decide you want it, just call for me. I'll bring it right in."

Jackie took a deep breath and released it. "Thank you."

* * *

Jackie closed her eyes just long enough for Gloria to think she was going to sleep. As soon as she heard Gloria's breathing slow she opened her eyes and sat back up. This was the first time she had been able to think since she got out of the PX. She went through the day in her head. Getting up, talking to Denise, going to the PX, hearing gunshots, helping the young woman and her kids… Brian pointing his gun at her, making her walk to the back of the PX, tying her hands behind her back… Jackie felt her chest tighten. It suddenly felt as if she couldn't breathe. She got out of bed and went to the bathroom. She looked at herself in the mirror. The bruise on her face was turning a dark shade of purple. She looked pale and she had dark circles under her eyes. She splashed cool water on her face and wiped it with a towel. She made her way out of the bathroom and walked to the window in the small hospital room.

* * *

"Jackie? You okay?" Gloria had woken and seen her staring out the window. She had tried to get Jackie's attention by saying her name, but she didn't respond. Gloria had climbed out of the reclining chair and walked over to her. When she still didn't respond to her she touched her shoulder.

Jackie didn't know how long she had been staring out the window when she felt a hand on her shoulder. She jumped and closed her eyes.

"I'm sorry! I didn't mean to scare you." Gloria held on to Jackie's arm. "Are you okay? Do you need me to do anything for you?"

Jackie turned to look at Gloria and that's when she saw the tears on Jackie's cheeks. "Oh, Jackie." She pulled the older woman into a hug.

**TBC**


	13. Chapter 13

**Sorry for the wait… **

Gloria stood with Jackie for several minutes allowing her to cry. She then slowly walked Jackie to the bed and got her to lie down. Gloria pulled the reclining chair closer and sat holding Jackie's hand. "Look, Jackie, I know how you feel about the pills but if you're having trouble getting to sleep-"

Jackie looked away in embarrassment. "It's not that I can't fall asleep; I don't want to." She took a shaky breath.

It hit Gloria then "You're afraid of nightmares." Jackie nodded. "Well maybe you won't have any since you're so tired."

"No. I'll have them. I all ready did." Jackie twisted her hands in her lap. "They sedated me earlier."

Gloria knew that. "Yeah, Denise told me."

"Well, when I woke from that it was straight into a nightmare. I don't want to feel that again." She looked at Gloria willing her to understand. "I don't want to _see_ that again."

Gloria understood. "I get that, I do. But you can't stay awake forever. The longer you stay awake, the worse it'll be 'cause you're gonna build it up in your head. I'm not gonna lie Jackie. You are gonna have some nightmares. What you went through was awful and I don't have any fancy education, but I know that your mind works stuff out in your sleep. It's gonna be scary, but you can make it better by talking about it." She saw that Jackie was listening so she kept talking. "When I was little and had a nightmare my mother would sit with me and talk about it. And I always felt better. I know that doesn't compare to what you're going through, but you got people who care about you. And we'll all be here to help you."

Jackie felt the tears again. She managed to say "Thank you" very quietly. They were quiet for a few minutes. Jackie squeezed Gloria's hand. "You are a very intelligent young woman with a very generous spirit. You may not possess a college degree, but your life education is more important than you realize." She smiled at Gloria. "I'm lucky to have met you Gloria, and I'm even luckier that I can call you my friend."

Now it was Gloria's turn to be teary. "Aw. Thanks Jackie. I never thought I'd be friends with a General's wife. It's pretty cool."

* * *

Gloria stayed awake until she saw that Jackie had finally fallen asleep. She kept the reclining chair close so she could be near in case Jackie needed her. At just after 4am, Jackie's scream woke her…

* * *

Jackie watched him throw her phone down then turn to her and yell that it was all her fault. She tried to talk to him, but he didn't listen. He picked up his gun and pointed it at himself. Jackie screamed "Noooooo!" He placed the gun under his chin and she watched him pull the trigger. She saw blood and brain splatter. She felt it hit her everywhere. She frantically shook her arms and kicked her legs. She felt something grabbing her and she tried to get away.

Gloria grabbed Jackie's arms and tried to calm her down. If she kept kicking and moving like she was, she was going to hurt herself. "Jackie! Jackie!" When Jackie twisted away from her, Gloria pulled her into a bear hug and held her tight. She felt it when Jackie woke up. She tried to jerk away but Gloria wouldn't let go. "It's okay Jackie, you're okay."

Jackie folded in on herself. "Oh God." She was shaking and trying to catch her breath. The nightmare was changing. Brian spoke to her and she saw him pull the trigger. She was pretty sure she hadn't really seen that…

* * *

Jackie had fallen into a restless slumber just before 6am. Her phone had woken her up just after 7. She answered it quickly so it wouldn't wake Gloria. "Hello?"

"Hey. Did I call too early?" Kevin was hoping he hadn't woken her. He waited as long as he could to call. He needed to hear her voice.

"No, not at all. I was just getting up." She hoped he couldn't hear that she was lying.

"So, obviously you got the new phone."

"Yes. Michael brought it to me last night."

"Good. I'm glad someone is there to take care of things for you." Kevin felt guilty about not being able to be there for his wife.

"Kevin. Don't. I'll be fine. You don't need to worry." Jackie hoped she sounded convincing.

"I am worried hon, I can't help it. What you went through, I …" he took a deep breath. "I just wish I could be there."

"I know. And I appreciate that. But, I also understand why you can't. I know it isn't your choice." Jackie needed him not to worry, but she wasn't sure if there was anything she could say to stop it.

"Even so, that doesn't make it any better." He sighed. "I'm sorry Jackie."

"Kevin." She strung his name out. "Please, don't do this to yourself. I'll be fine. I'm better now, I promise." She knew he was worrying that she would be stressed to the point she would turn to pills again. "It's not going to happen again. I have support here, I'm not going back down that road."

"I'm glad you have support, believe me. But I know you; you're stubborn. You handle everything so no one else has to. You can't do that this time. Okay?" He paused for just a few seconds. "Promise me Jackie."

Jackie looked down at her wrist and saw the bruises. They looked awful and she was sure her face looked even worse. In a way, it was good that Kevin wouldn't see her like this. "I promise. You'll see. I'll be fine."

* * *

Denise arrived at the hospital just after 8am. She had gone by Jackie's house and picked up some clothes. When she came into Jackie's room she saw Gloria asleep on the reclining chair. She didn't see Jackie right away. She set the bag of clothing on the bed and looked around. Jackie startled her when she came out of the bathroom.

Denise saw the rings under Jackie's eyes. "Hey." She smiled. "Did you get any rest?"

Jackie smiled in return and then focused on the bag. She answered quietly "Yes. Did you have any trouble finding anything?" She pulled the clean clothing out.

Denise wished she wouldn't deflect so easily. She was a pro at it. "No. Your house is so organized, I knew I wouldn't have any trouble."

Jackie laid the clothes over her arm and headed toward the bathroom. "I'll be right back."

As she closed the door, Gloria sat up and looked at Denise. "She didn't get any rest. She was afraid to go to sleep and when she finally did, she only slept for maybe two hours before she was screaming out."

Denise wasn't surprised. "Well, unfortunately, that will probably happen more. At least until she's able to talk it out and process it a little."

Gloria nodded. "I just hope she trusts us enough to help her." Gloria thought for a second. "The nurse tried to get her to take something to help her sleep last night and she got freaked out."

"Oh no." Denise was afraid that would happen. "What did she do?"

"Well we kind of said Jackie would call her if she wanted the pills and they said that would be okay." Gloria stood and walked toward Denise. "Is any of that pill stuff in her medical records? I would hope they would be careful what they prescribed her, you know?"

Denise looked toward the bathroom door and then back to Gloria. "No. She didn't get treated on base for that, so there is no record."

"So, what she shared with all of us that day after the banquet, nobody else knows?"

"I doubt anybody else does, except for Kevin. Jackie is very private." Denise was thinking she wished the hospital had record of Jackie's pill use. She would talk to Jackie about at least letting Roland know during the visit he would have with her this morning. He would be the one prescribing anything she would get since he was doing the evaluation.

Gloria thought about how strong she knew Jackie was and then about how lost she had seemed in the middle of the night when the nightmare hit. "I'm worried about her Denise."

Denise knew exactly how she felt. "Me too. But she has us." She put her hand on Gloria's shoulder. "And together we'll make sure she gets through this."

**TBC**


	14. Chapter 14

**Sorry for the delay. Life is busy and I'm pretty sure my muse has gone on vacation… :(**

When Jackie came out of the bathroom after changing, Gloria was getting her stuff together to leave. Gloria excused herself to the bathroom. Jackie laid her gown on the bed and took her shoes out of the bag.

Denise watched her closely. "Have you heard form Michael this morning?"

"Yes. He called just before you came." Jackie sat on the foot of the bed. "He's going to pick me up at 9:30. The interview is set for 10:00."

"Good. I'm glad he's taking you." Denise was glad. She didn't want Jackie to face that alone. Michael assured her he would stay there through the interview and then make sure Jackie got to her car and then home okay.

"Uh, yeah." Jackie wished she could just go on her own and then go home. She's felt on the razor's edge of losing it since this happened and when she falls apart, she wants to be alone.

Gloria came out of the bathroom. "I'm gonna head out now."

Jackie got up and helped Gloria get her stuff together. She gave Gloria a hug. "Thank you, Gloria. For being here." Jackie looked down. She was embarrassed.

Gloria grabbed Jackie's hands. "Anytime Jackie. I mean that. You call me, okay?"

Jackie nodded at her and then sat back on the bed. "Okay, thanks."

Gloria looked at Denise and gave a slight nod toward Jackie. She was saying 'keep me in the loop' and 'we'll watch out for her together' without actually saying anything out loud. "Bye Denise."

Denise nodded in understanding. "Bye Gloria."

As soon as Gloria left the room, Denise sat on the bed next to Jackie. Just as she started to speak, there was a knock on the door.

Roland tapped on the door as he pushed it all the way open. He came in and saw both women sitting on the bed. "Hey Jackie, Denise." He smiled at them.

Denise spoke first. "Hey Roland." She stood, walked toward him and gave him a quick hug. "I'm going to head down to the ER." She looked directly at Jackie. "Call me when you're settled at home, okay?"

Jackie stood. "Thank you Denise. For everything…"

Denise smiled at her. "No thanks necessary. I'll be here whenever you need me." She smiled at Roland before she turned to leave the room.

Roland pulled a chair over and sat near the foot of the bed. He had a note pad in a leather bound notebook that he sat on his lap.

Jackie looked at the notebook and felt uneasy. "Are you back at Mercer? I thought you had just come back for Claudia Joy's memorial."

Roland realized she had most likely not been told she was going to be evaluated before they let her leave. "No, I'm not back on staff at Mercer. I just agreed to do this because they don't have a civilian psychiatrist on staff yet and they thought you might be more comfortable with me as opposed to a military doctor."

Jackie's eyes went wide. "More comfortable with you? What do you mean?"

"I've been asked to do an evaluation to make sure you're in a good place before they discharge you." Roland spoke softly. He wished someone would've told her about this.

"What?" Jackie shook her head. "I'm not crazy. I don't understand."

Roland stood up and took Jackie's hand. "No one thinks you're crazy Jackie. You went through something very traumatic yesterday. We just want to be sure you're handling it okay before we send you out of here. It's hospital policy. Whenever someone is brought in having experienced a trauma, the hospital psychiatrist meets with them before they're discharged; to check in, make sure they know what to expect, and give them contacts in case they need or want any follow up care after they leave the hospital."

"So, this is mandatory? I can't leave until I get evaluated and cleared?" Jackie wasn't comfortable with the thought of being evaluated. She immediately expected a million questions and was afraid her past problems would come up.

Roland tugged on her hand. He sat back down in the chair and nodded his head toward the end of the bed. "It is. But, it's really not a big deal. I'm just going to tell you about what you can expect to be feeling, go over some symptoms to keep an eye out for, and discuss any symptoms you may all ready be experiencing."

Jackie looked skeptical as she sat down on the bed. She stared at the floor, took a deep breath, and let it out slowly. She looked up at Roland. "So, how does this work?"

Roland smiled at her. "We're just going to talk Jackie, that's all. Are you okay with that?"

"Uh. Sure, that's okay." She took another deep breath and folded her hands together on her lap. That was the only way she could keep them from fidgeting.

"Good." Roland opened his notebook and got his pen out. He set it on his lap. He saw Jackie staring nervously at it. "It's just to help me remember what we talk about. I have to write a small summary to be put in your file with my recommendation." He saw how uncomfortable she felt with that. "I destroy the notes. I can let you look at them before I do, if that would make you more comfortable."

The report would be in her file. _In her file._ She wasn't entirely comfortable with that, but it couldn't be helped. At least it was a documented incident that couldn't come back to bite Kevin in the ass, not like her breakdown and pill problem could have if anyone had discovered it. "No, no that's okay."

Roland noticed Jackie was staring blankly in front of her. "Why don't we start with what happened yesterday. I know some of the basics but, it would help to hear it from your point of view."

"Okay." Jackie closed her eyes and crossed her legs. "I was going to the PX to get stuff for the FRG luncheon we're having… Oh my God! That's today!" Jackie completely forgot about it.

Roland reached out and put his hand on Jackie's arm. He didn't want her getting worked up before they even got to the hard stuff. "Denise mentioned that to me yesterday. She made some calls and cancelled the lunch."

Jackie nodded her head. "Of course she did. What would I do without her?"

"Denise is a good friend. I know that first hand. We're both lucky to have her around." Roland seized this moment to point out to Jackie how she had people around her to help. "You know, Denise and the other wives were in the lobby yesterday. They all showed up for you."

"They did?" Jackie was surprised to hear this.

"You seem surprised by that." Roland didn't know Jackie as well as the other wives but he could tell she was a perfectionist who cared a lot about appearances and was preoccupied with not doing anything to damage her husband's career in any way.

"Yeah, I guess I am a little surprised." Jackie was at a loss for words.

Roland went with a hunch. "You would be there for one of them, right?"

Jackie nodded. "Of course…"

"Jackie. There are a lot of people who care about and want to be there for you. I have a feeling that might be scary for you, but you need support right now." He paused to let that sink in. "The next few weeks may be a little difficult. Having support around can really make a difference."

Jackie looked down at her hands fidgeting in her lap. "I know."

"Okay. Let's go back to what happened yesterday. You went to the PX…" Roland felt worried for her. He could see she was someone who held things in. He had a few people in mind he wanted to refer her to, he hoped she would be willing to see a therapist for follow up.

Jackie took a deep breath and began talking. She didn't look up from her lap. "I went to the PX…"

**TBC **

**The rest of Roland's evaluation will be in the next chapter…**


	15. Chapter 15

**I don't believe my muse is back in full effect just yet. But, I am happy to have this chapter finally finished. I wasn't kidding a few chapters ago when I said the facts were easy to write but the emotional fall out was difficult… **

Jackie explained how she was in the produce section when she heard the shots fired and how she had seen the young mother with her two children. She described trying to get them out the back entrance and how she had hidden them in the closet when she realized they couldn't safely get to the door.

Roland wondered why she had hidden them but left herself out in the open. "Why didn't you go into the closet with them?"

"It was too small." She thought for a few seconds. "Plus, I thought if I stayed out, I could watch for him to leave and then maybe get us all out the back door." Jackie remembered watching Brian walk back toward the store. "He was walking away and…" She could hear the little girl squeal. She saw him turn back and scan the room. She had thought they would be okay and then-

"Jackie?" Roland could see she was lost in thought. "Jackie?" The second time he said her name she startled and looked up at him. "You doing okay?"

Jackie shook her head as if she was trying to clear it. "Yeah. Yeah, I'm fine."

Roland gave her a few seconds to pull herself together. "How did you end up in the store with him?"

Jackie took a deep breath. "My cell phone rang. Before I could get it shut off, he found me." She explained how he had pointed his gun at her and told her to walk back into the store. He led her to the back, by the appliances. Jackie stared at the wall and her eyes became unfocused as she thought about Brian hitting her in the face and then tying her up. She unconsciously put her hand over the bruise on her cheek.

Roland saw her hand go to her face. "Is that when he hit you?" His voice snapped her back.

"Yes." She swallowed. "Then he, he tied my hands behind my back."

"I can only imagine how scared you must have been." Roland spoke softly.

Jackie nodded her head and folded her arms in front of her. "Yeah." She rubbed her upper arms as if she were cold and trying to warm herself up. She was quiet for a few seconds. "It was weird. He was yelling at me and then all of the sudden he sat down with me and apologized for hurting me."

"It sounds as if he may have been dealing with some PTSD issues. I understand he had just come back from deployment." Roland had gotten some details on the soldier from Joan.

"He told me he had just come back. He heard from some of the soldiers in his company that his wife had been seeing someone else. Then she was gone when he got home and I guess he just snapped." Jackie couldn't help but feel sad for the soldier. It was so confusing. She felt bad for him, wanted to help him, but was also scared to death of him.

Roland could tell Jackie had felt bad for the soldier. "You felt bad for him."

"Yeah, I did." Jackie squeezed her arms tighter to herself. "I told him the way he was feeling was understandable. I told him he needed help and that he should talk to somebody." Jackie thought back to Brian yelling at her. "He was fine until I said that." She had been scared of him and felt sorry for him at the same time. She was having trouble reconciling her conflicting feelings.

Roland could see she was beating herself up for not knowing how to handle Brian. "People who are in the place he was in are hard to reach. It sounds like you were able to get to him even if it was just a little. He felt bad for hurting you which means he did connect with you on some personal level." Roland could see Jackie was hanging on his every word. It was obvious that she felt guilty for Brian's death. He knew he needed to get her away from that line of thinking. "You handled the situation incredibly well. I'm a trained therapist and I don't think for a minute that I could have done any better."

Jackie shook her head and looked away. _'I don't feel very good about it.' _"I just wish… I wish it wouldn't have ended that way."

Roland nodded his head in agreement. "We all do. But we can't control everything. Brian was the one who determined how it ended. It was his choice to take his own life."

Jackie nodded her head slightly. "I know."

"You okay to finish?" Roland wanted to get to when he actually shot himself. He needed Jackie to talk through it. When she nodded he encouraged her to keep going. "What happened next?"

Jackie explained the conversation they had about the throw phone and how Brian hadn't wanted to go get it. She, very 'matter of factly', described how Brian had hidden behind her and grabbed the phone. She started to move on but Roland stopped her.

"You describe how he basically used you as a human shield in such a detached manner."

Jackie was confused. "What do you mean?"

"Well, just that he put you in front of him so if anyone shot in that direction, they would hit you instead of him. How did you feel about that?" Roland wanted her to realize that Brian wasn't looking out for her the way she seemed to think he did. He had been ready to sacrifice her if necessary.

Jackie thought for a moment. "I hadn't really thought about it like that." She looked down at her hands. "I mean, I think he knew they wouldn't shoot me and so he used me to protect himself."

"True. But, he also knew that if even one person slipped up and fired a shot, he wouldn't get hit." Roland could tell she was processing what he was saying.

"Then why did he kill himself, Roland? Why did he use me as a shield and then just kill himself later? Why didn't he just shoot _me_? I don't understand." Jackie was feeling more confused now. Her brain was in a scramble.

"I don't know the answers Jackie. That's what I'm trying to point out to you. His behavior was completely erratic and unpredictable. There was no way anyone could have guessed what he was going to do."

Jackie nodded her head. She did get it. He _was_ unpredictable, but even she knew if Brian found out she was the General's wife... "But I knew his reaction wouldn't be good if he knew who I was."

Roland knew how that had happened, but he needed Jackie to talk it through. He needed her to see it was a fluke and not something she could have prevented. "Explain how that happened."

Jackie took a deep breath. "My cell phone rang." Jackie thought about how he had gotten upset each time her phone had gone off. "He grabbed it and answered." She looked down at her hands, which were now twisting in her lap. "It was Kevin. I could hear his voice. They exchanged some words…" She licked her lips and swallowed. "Brian asked who Kevin was and he… he said he was General Clarke and…" Jackie was drawing in long, deep breaths trying to keep her composure.

Roland saw her struggling to hold herself together. "It's okay. Take your time Jackie." He watched her closely, waiting for her to calm again. The friend in Roland wanted to reach out and take her hand for support, but the doctor in him knew he had to let her get through this on her own. He waited just a bit before he asked very softly "What happened next?"

Jackie laced her fingers together tightly in her lap. She looked up at Roland and swallowed the lump in her throat. "He threw my phone down and he started pacing back and forth. He kept saying _'you're the General's wife?'" _ Jackie's tears were flowing freely now. "I tried to say that it didn't matter who I was, but he didn't listen. He just picked up his gun and he, he pointed it-" She pulled her knees up and buried her face in them.

Roland heard a sob break loose and saw Jackie's body trembling. Professional or not, he couldn't stand to see her hurting so badly. He set down the notebook he had been holding and went over to her. He sat next to her on the bed and put his arm around her shoulders. "You're going to get through this Jackie. I promise."

Jackie nodded her head while wiping her tears. "I know." She grabbed Roland's hand. "I'll be fine. I'll be fine."

Roland backed away from her slightly. "You're a strong woman Jackie. But even strong people need help sometimes. You have people around you that care about you and want to help."

"I know." Jackie rubbed her hands along her thighs smoothing out imaginary wrinkles.

Roland wanted to talk about symptoms she might experience. "Jackie, there are some things I want you to pay close attention to…" He took the next few minutes to explain PTSD and what she should watch out for. He then stood and grabbed his notebook. He pulled out a prescription pad and filled out the form for some pills to help her sleep.

Jackie watched as he wrote out the prescription. Roland wasn't aware of her pill problem. She hoped he would just give her the form and not take it to get it filled for her.

Roland completed the form and tore it from the pad. He handed it to Jackie. She hesitated in taking it. "This is just in case you need it; if you have trouble sleeping." He then took a piece of paper from the notebook and handed that to her as well. "These are the names of a few therapists I know in the Charleston area. I think you would do well with any of the three of them." Jackie hesitated again. "You should really follow up with one of them Jackie. The trauma you experienced could be difficult to handle for a while. A good therapist will help you get your feet back under you sooner."

Jackie took the paper. "Thank you Roland. I appreciate it."

"No thanks necessary. Just please follow up with someone okay?"

Jackie nodded her head. "Okay."

They heard a knock at the door. Michael then slowly opened the door up. As soon as he saw Roland he stopped. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to interrupt." He started to back out.

Roland spoke up "It's okay. We were just finishing up." He turned back to Jackie. "Can I call you later? Just to check in?"

"Uh, sure. That would be fine." She reached out her hand and Roland took it. She thanked him as they shook hands. She then excused herself to the bathroom. She needed to freshen up before they left for the police interview.

Roland headed for the door. He exchanged pleasantries with Michael.

After Roland left the room, the nurse entered. Jackie was just coming out of the bathroom as she came in. "Mrs. Clarke. I have your discharge papers." The nurse explained the papers and told her again what to expect and what to watch out for. She then left the room.

Michael turned to Jackie. "You ready to go?"

Jackie took a deep breath and nodded her head. "Yes." She made her way past him and left the room. Michael saw that she had left the papers Roland handed her on the tray table next the foot of the bed. He grabbed them and followed her out of the room.

**TBC **

**Thanks for your patience. I'll try to get the next chapter out much faster, but I can't make any promises…**


	16. Chapter 16

Jackie exited the interview a little shaken up. The Detective walked out behind her. "Thank you Mrs. Clarke. I know that was difficult." He reached into his pocket. "If you think of anything else or if you have any questions, please don't hesitate to call." He handed her a card with his name and number on it.

Jackie took the card from him. "Okay. Thank you." The detective went back into his office. She looked down at the card as she leaned back against the wall. _'I just want to go home… escape all this. Just for a little while.'_

Michael had been standing down the hall talking with some soldiers when Jackie came out. He saw the detective turn away from Jackie and he saw her lean against the wall looking like she was ready to pass out. He approached her. As he walked up she caught him out of the corner of her eye. He noticed how she pulled herself together when she saw him. "All finished up?"

Jackie took a deep breath and nodded her head. "Yes."

"Good. Let's get you home." He turned with her and they walked out of the building together.

* * *

The ride was quiet. Michael didn't want to push her, but he could tell the interview had taken its toll on her. "I'm so sorry about everything you're going through Jackie."

Jackie looked over at him. "It's not your fault Michael." She looked back out the passenger side window. "Sometimes things just happen."

Neither one of them said a word for the rest of the trip.

* * *

Michael drove into the PX parking lot and pulled up behind Jackie's BMW. He noticed how tense she got when she saw the front of the building.

Jackie felt her heart rate increase and her palms get sweaty as she stared at the front doors of the PX. _'Deep breaths Jackie. It's over. You're fine.' _She managed a few deep breaths then she turned to Michael as she unbuckled her seatbelt and removed her keys from her purse. "Thank you Michael. For everything; the phone, the ride… calling Kevin…" She looked down at her keys.

"You're welcome. I was glad to help."

Jackie turned and exited the vehicle. Before she could shut the door Michael added "Jackie, please, call me if you need anything. I'm right next door and it's no bother, seriously."

She leaned over to look at him. "That's sweet of you, thanks." She nodded as she backed away. "But, I'll be fine."

Michael waited until she was in her car and had the engine running before he drove away.

Jackie started her car and waved to Michael as he pulled away. She took one more look at the PX and then backed her car slowly out of the parking space. Yesterday seemed so far away, but every time she closed her eyes she was right back there. She didn't know how she would get through the next few days, but she convinced herself she would be fine. All she needed to do was get home, get inside her house, lock the door, and everything would calm down.

* * *

Jackie unlocked her front door and went inside. She closed the door behind her, locked it, and leaned her forehead against it. She drew in a deep breath, slipped her shoes off, and turned to walk through to the kitchen. The first thing she noticed was how quiet it was. She wasn't sure if that was comforting or unnerving.

She dropped her purse on the table and reached for a glass. She filled the glass half way with tap water and drank it quickly. She filled the glass again and turned off the tap. She carried it with her to the refrigerator. Her stomach had been growling for the past few hours and even though she knew she should eat, she couldn't find anything that she felt she could comfortably put in her mouth.

Her immediate thirst satisfied, she left the kitchen and walked back toward the front of the house. Just as she turned to go up the stairs, the doorbell rang. It was unexpected. She jumped and dropped the glass of water. It hit the corner of the bottom step, shattered at her feet, and sent pieces of glass and water everywhere.

* * *

Michael pulled into his parking space in front of the main building. As he turned to walk inside he noticed the prescription bag sitting on the back seat. _'Damn.' _Afraid Jackie might need it, he unlocked his door and got back in his car.

It only took him a few minutes to get to Jackie's house. He parked out front and made his way to the door. He rang the bell and heard "aahhhh!" before the sound of breaking glass. He quickly knocked on the door several times "Jackie!?"

* * *

Jackie took a second to catch her breath and, after realizing what she had done, covered her eyes with both hands. She heard Michael yelling her name and turned to go toward the door, immediately regretting her action when she stepped on the broken glass with her bare feet. "Ugh! Damnit!" She looked down to see a small amount of blood on the floor. She looked up toward the ceiling with tears of frustration in her eyes "Really?"

"Jackie!? Are you okay!?"

"Yeah!" She looked down at the glass all around her. "Just give me a second!" She had no choice but to step lightly through the glass to get to the door. She took a few deep breaths before opening it, trying to calm down.

The door opened and the first thing Michael saw was an, obviously, overwhelmed Jackie with tears threatening to fall. She winced in pain as she backed away from the door to let him in. He looked down and saw blood on the floor. He followed the small blood trail to the broken glass and realized what had happened. He turned back to Jackie. She was bracing herself against the door, trying to stand on the parts of her feet that weren't injured. He stepped toward her. "How bad is it?"

She looked down. "I don't know. I haven't looked."

Michael scooped her up before she realized what was happening. She squealed and grabbed his neck. "Hold on."

"Michael! What are you doing?"

He carried her to the kitchen and sat her down in a chair. "Let's get you settled down so I can take a look at the damage." He grabbed a paper towel and got it damp in the sink.

"You don't need to do that. I'm sure it's just minor scratches." Jackie pulled her foot up and tried to see the bottom of it. "I can take care of it."

Michael pulled a chair in front of hers and sat. He gently took hold of her ankles and put her feet in his lap. He ignored her protests as he carefully ran the damp towel over her feet.

Jackie hissed in pain and pulled her feet back. "Ow!"

"Sorry." Michael took the towel away. "It looks like you have some small shards of glass stuck in several places. Nothing looks big enough to need stitches." He looked from her foot to her face. "First aid kit?"

"Michael. You need to go. I've taken enough of your time. I can take care of it." She tried to put her feet down but he wouldn't let go.

"No arguments. I'm happy to help." He waited for to make eye contact. "First aid kit?"

Jackie audibly sighed. "Cabinet, above the refrigerator."

* * *

An hour later Jackie had her feet bandaged and Michael had cleaned up all the broken glass. He had used a pair of tweezers to pull a dozen tiny glass pieces out of her feet. He had put peroxide on the cut areas and covered them with anti biotic ointment before covering both feet with bandages.

"Thanks. You should probably go now. I feel bad taking so much of your time." Jackie went to stand and gasped when she put her full weight on her sore feet.

Michael grabbed her off her feet just like he had before. "Nonsense Jackie. I told Kevin I would take care of you until he got home, and I meant it." Michael carried her, in spite of her protesting, to the living room and settled her on the couch.

Jackie felt herself getting emotional as she thought about Kevin and the fact that he was so far away. She nodded her head and looked down, hoping she could get her feelings under control before Michael noticed. She failed. She brought her hands to her face to cover it.

"Hey." He scooted close to her and put his arm around her shoulders. "It's okay to lean on the people around you. You went through something terrible Jackie. It's gonna take a while, but you will be okay." He pulled her to his chest and put his other arm around her to hold her tight. They sat like that for a few minutes, until Michael felt her calm.

Jackie pulled away from him and took a deep breath. She wiped her eyes and looked at him. At the question in his eyes she responded, "I'll be fine. Thank you."

"No thanks necessary." He stood up and then remembered why he had come over in the first place. "Oh, I almost forgot the reason I came by." He walked to the small table by the door and grabbed the prescription he had filled for her and the papers she had left at the hospital. He came back and held them out to her.

Jackie froze and felt her stomach drop at the sight of the pharmacy bag.

"Jackie?" Michael got nervous that maybe it was wrong of him to fill it for her. She seemed upset. "I'm sorry if this was a little too personal for me to do, I was just trying to help."

"No, it's okay." She pulled up her mask. "It's fine. I had just forgotten all about it."

"Okay. Well, I'll just sit this here." He put the bag on the coffee table. "Is there anything I can get you before I go?"

"No. I'm fine." Jackie smiled at him.

"Ok. Please call me if you need anything. I'll call later to check on you-if that's okay…"

"It's not necessary, but if you're supposed to report to Kevin then please do. I need for him to know that I'm okay." Jackie hated that Kevin was halfway across the world in a combat zone and worrying about her instead of keeping himself safe.

"Understood."

**TBC**

**Life is getting in the way of me writing right now. Just know I'm still working on this! I type a little every few days… Thanks for the continued support.**


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